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Okay. So right now I'm going to set my requests aside for a moment, I'm going to stop being a fan-girl and I am going to be serious for just a moment. Because I am hurting.
I may not be gay, and I may not go to public school, but I know how it feels to be abandoned. For those of you out there who are gay and are being prosecuted for it and have to wear those bandages, you probably have the feeling to. Whether it was your parents, or society in general, you know that feeling. My sister is gay, and she was shunned her whole life by our father and wouldn't let her be who she wants to be. And I resent and pity him for that. For not seeing the wonderful person that I live with everyday. He shunned me too. So I know how it feels. I know how it feels to be abandoned. I know your pain. And did I cut? Yes. I did actually. I was in the 7th grade at the time, I didn't even know what an 'emo' was. But I stole my stepmother's exacto knives and would cut my fingers. Just for some form of relief, to remind myself that I was human and that I did matter. Not for attention or for the pain. To remind myself. I was only 12 or so at the time, and I didn't realize that until now. So for those of you who cut, I am begging you stop. Because you are only doing more harm than good to your emotional stability. I am ashamed of myself, even though I didn't know why I was doing it. Because the horrible part was, I covered for my father and would do anything to get positive attention from him because I got nothing else. So I made up things, so that he would love me. He never did.
But my life got better, and even though I still hurt, my life got better. And it will for you too. Please believe that.
Here is my story. What's yours?
I may not be gay, and I may not go to public school, but I know how it feels to be abandoned. For those of you out there who are gay and are being prosecuted for it and have to wear those bandages, you probably have the feeling to. Whether it was your parents, or society in general, you know that feeling. My sister is gay, and she was shunned her whole life by our father and wouldn't let her be who she wants to be. And I resent and pity him for that. For not seeing the wonderful person that I live with everyday. He shunned me too. So I know how it feels. I know how it feels to be abandoned. I know your pain. And did I cut? Yes. I did actually. I was in the 7th grade at the time, I didn't even know what an 'emo' was. But I stole my stepmother's exacto knives and would cut my fingers. Just for some form of relief, to remind myself that I was human and that I did matter. Not for attention or for the pain. To remind myself. I was only 12 or so at the time, and I didn't realize that until now. So for those of you who cut, I am begging you stop. Because you are only doing more harm than good to your emotional stability. I am ashamed of myself, even though I didn't know why I was doing it. Because the horrible part was, I covered for my father and would do anything to get positive attention from him because I got nothing else. So I made up things, so that he would love me. He never did.
But my life got better, and even though I still hurt, my life got better. And it will for you too. Please believe that.
Here is my story. What's yours?
Image size
768x526px 76.67 KB
Make
NIKON
Model
COOLPIX L105
Shutter Speed
10/99 second
Aperture
F/3.5
Focal Length
5 mm
ISO Speed
800
Date Taken
Sep 9, 2012, 8:57:01 PM
© 2012 - 2024 ElyssaJM
Comments17
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I am really sorry to hear that about your sister, but thank you very much for sharing that with us. I just want to add that it gets better for those who makes it better; do not wait to be rescued by someone, be your own hero.